In general the things we argue about represent very little of the actual Government. For example, things like defense, social security, homeland security are all things that are supported by nearly everybody. Whether a particular weapon system gets funded or what the social security cola should be might be arguments, but the broad topic is something agreed on.
It seems like the differences are greater than they are because we have a press that mostly focuses on the interesting arguments and a president who treats everything as a political issue.
Take immigration. Everybody, or at least almost everybody would want policies that weed our terrorists and known criminals while allowing asylum seekers and desirable immigrants access. Its not that hard but of course you need to understand that you are dealing with many individuals, each whom has their own issues.
They are not selected by their home countries to come here. They are not generally terrorists or drug smugglers. They are generally fleeing the gangs, not joining them. They don't become a long term drain on our resources, once they get settled.
To believe these things is the result of rhetoric with no basis in facts.
Yes, in any fairly large group of people you will have some who aren't going to obey the law and who might commit a crime, but these are the exceptions. It would be like saying all Americans are mass murderers because some have committed mass murder. Its just not logical or correct.
The idea of working together on the things that unite us while debating the things we disagree on isn't really that alien a concept. We used to do it all the time.
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